Sunday, January 16, 2005
if there's anything i've learnt
in the past year, it's that time is never on my side, even when in plenty. and if there's anything i've learnt in my life so far, it's that i seldom cope with long-term goals.
well, few. though i'm proud to say i do work toward them, in my funny little way. all the opportunities ever come my way have been thought and rethought through and thorough; all experience brought about, both significant and in-, have been long and creatively pondered as to their possibility of future application - as creative as i dare name myself. very obscure, far-fetched possibilities, but it Has happened.
anyway, it was while helping write alex's business planning essay, curse his balls, that i'd been given insight into er, business planning. in terms of objectives, goals and circumstance-specific. the logic of these i dare say everyone will have from basic intuition, but having it put into words just... cleared it up. i found i Did have objectives buried somewhere, and all i worked on consciously were the goals-specific plans. (it was also here i was presented with the amoral idea of charging $$$ for essays and - never underestimate honkies' financial acumen - of base deposit with the complete payment amount depending on the grade that essay gets.)
but as anyone would know, i'm not a plan type. i think in days and weeks, 2 months being about all i can take - so years, decades? plans completely elude me. which brings us to another thing i've learnt being in melbourne... that is trusting Effortless Faith (TM) and the luck that goes hand in hand. most of my long-term objectives just work themselves out. i just say whatever the world wants to bring upon me, is whatever happens. or interpreted from my karmic, atheist beliefs, simplified into a phrasal concept: insya-allah.
edward de bono coined the phrase 'analysis paralysis', which is round about what's happening here. four paragraphs is a bit in excess before i get straight to the point. my new years' resolutions - short and sweet - not requiring painstaking labour and continual review... are as follows:
u'll never ever know, if u never ever go. i can safely say i've been to the bitter hell of poor - even pathetic - health, and back? on the way. on such sound motivation, this is going to be the one year these dreams will work out. i was never keen on resolutions. (and if u're wondering, the soup is a salutary gesture to ben.) thinking is not enough, u must apply; willing is not enough, u must do. 21 years loom, adulthood beckons. responsibility bears down inevitable, like the incubus keeping your eyes gummed shut.
well, few. though i'm proud to say i do work toward them, in my funny little way. all the opportunities ever come my way have been thought and rethought through and thorough; all experience brought about, both significant and in-, have been long and creatively pondered as to their possibility of future application - as creative as i dare name myself. very obscure, far-fetched possibilities, but it Has happened.
anyway, it was while helping write alex's business planning essay, curse his balls, that i'd been given insight into er, business planning. in terms of objectives, goals and circumstance-specific. the logic of these i dare say everyone will have from basic intuition, but having it put into words just... cleared it up. i found i Did have objectives buried somewhere, and all i worked on consciously were the goals-specific plans. (it was also here i was presented with the amoral idea of charging $$$ for essays and - never underestimate honkies' financial acumen - of base deposit with the complete payment amount depending on the grade that essay gets.)
but as anyone would know, i'm not a plan type. i think in days and weeks, 2 months being about all i can take - so years, decades? plans completely elude me. which brings us to another thing i've learnt being in melbourne... that is trusting Effortless Faith (TM) and the luck that goes hand in hand. most of my long-term objectives just work themselves out. i just say whatever the world wants to bring upon me, is whatever happens. or interpreted from my karmic, atheist beliefs, simplified into a phrasal concept: insya-allah.
edward de bono coined the phrase 'analysis paralysis', which is round about what's happening here. four paragraphs is a bit in excess before i get straight to the point. my new years' resolutions - short and sweet - not requiring painstaking labour and continual review... are as follows:
- drink more water.
- learn to boil soups.
- and drink more soup.
- cut down on ciggies.
- (for later) capoeira.
u'll never ever know, if u never ever go. i can safely say i've been to the bitter hell of poor - even pathetic - health, and back? on the way. on such sound motivation, this is going to be the one year these dreams will work out. i was never keen on resolutions. (and if u're wondering, the soup is a salutary gesture to ben.) thinking is not enough, u must apply; willing is not enough, u must do. 21 years loom, adulthood beckons. responsibility bears down inevitable, like the incubus keeping your eyes gummed shut.
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
.......
(indicates mindset in stasis)
what's worse than staying at the office till 2 in the morning? having your first salary thrown to the winds by cause of debt. well it's not as bad as it sounds... what happened was i got my $500 in cold cash last week only to return home to a note on my desk from mom, saying i still owe her $460... all the way from july. shared cost for dad's bday present. not like i need the money anyway was seriously considering chucking it all to the tsunami victims. but a fleeting moment, and that thought was gone. =p next payday then...
to those heartless people who feel indifferent, please remember u belong to this country, and that all events, national and global, co-influence history and the consequences reach u somehow anyway (my pseudo-socialist thinking brought about by reading mao's communist propaganda comics =) ) if it hasn't crossed your mind, watch out for the exchange rate for next term's uni fees.
meanwhile, life goes on. i now run a one-man show for tgv's movie listings, and to spreadouters, please excuse the incessant bragging =p. if put more tactfully, it will seem a juggernaut of a task - 7 national papers! and to those who've been inconvenienced by wrong schedules in the press, please hentam me, and not tgv... else we're in risk of ruining my boss's new account! but everyone checks online nowadays, so my potential mistakes account for little... so i think... but still, i like to have no margin for errors; ideally, no errors. have made quite a few mistakes while under pressure of hour-deadlines but as is known, life goes on. learn, and move.
neglecting blogging has also diminished my writing. i sat opposite my boss typing out a letter and was simply astonished at the amount of time he took. proof practice is the sole key to perfection. watch an expert artist photoshoping with just his keyboard and u'll see. Be that artist and u'll know. much as i'd like to practise my writing... there's too much happening now. a few of my family were a little scandalized that i work this much (2am on some days, and last sunday as well - 2nd jan!!) but in my views - in the name of experience - all justified - i'm happy.
when i look back on my blog and see this Huge interval in my blogging activity, all will be justfied again =)
must work on reading and writing... i'm taking copywriting workshops and dear yuan while enrolling, also put in a creative writing elective. hahaHAAAH the irony! but if times clash - out the window it goes. on the other side, i'm fulfiling half of my resolutions to read. finished satanic verses - that took an age - frantically devouring the daughter (hehe read that again) of the empire and hoping to finish the servant and mistress, and also some gao xingjian... dunno where to find the time.
still to be done this month... pay for air ticket, take passport photo before that, cut my neck, possible extraction of a wisdom tooth, on top of all that my social life... phwaorrrr.
what's worse than staying at the office till 2 in the morning? having your first salary thrown to the winds by cause of debt. well it's not as bad as it sounds... what happened was i got my $500 in cold cash last week only to return home to a note on my desk from mom, saying i still owe her $460... all the way from july. shared cost for dad's bday present. not like i need the money anyway was seriously considering chucking it all to the tsunami victims. but a fleeting moment, and that thought was gone. =p next payday then...
to those heartless people who feel indifferent, please remember u belong to this country, and that all events, national and global, co-influence history and the consequences reach u somehow anyway (my pseudo-socialist thinking brought about by reading mao's communist propaganda comics =) ) if it hasn't crossed your mind, watch out for the exchange rate for next term's uni fees.
meanwhile, life goes on. i now run a one-man show for tgv's movie listings, and to spreadouters, please excuse the incessant bragging =p. if put more tactfully, it will seem a juggernaut of a task - 7 national papers! and to those who've been inconvenienced by wrong schedules in the press, please hentam me, and not tgv... else we're in risk of ruining my boss's new account! but everyone checks online nowadays, so my potential mistakes account for little... so i think... but still, i like to have no margin for errors; ideally, no errors. have made quite a few mistakes while under pressure of hour-deadlines but as is known, life goes on. learn, and move.
neglecting blogging has also diminished my writing. i sat opposite my boss typing out a letter and was simply astonished at the amount of time he took. proof practice is the sole key to perfection. watch an expert artist photoshoping with just his keyboard and u'll see. Be that artist and u'll know. much as i'd like to practise my writing... there's too much happening now. a few of my family were a little scandalized that i work this much (2am on some days, and last sunday as well - 2nd jan!!) but in my views - in the name of experience - all justified - i'm happy.
when i look back on my blog and see this Huge interval in my blogging activity, all will be justfied again =)
must work on reading and writing... i'm taking copywriting workshops and dear yuan while enrolling, also put in a creative writing elective. hahaHAAAH the irony! but if times clash - out the window it goes. on the other side, i'm fulfiling half of my resolutions to read. finished satanic verses - that took an age - frantically devouring the daughter (hehe read that again) of the empire and hoping to finish the servant and mistress, and also some gao xingjian... dunno where to find the time.
still to be done this month... pay for air ticket, take passport photo before that, cut my neck, possible extraction of a wisdom tooth, on top of all that my social life... phwaorrrr.
